50 Things I Learnt from Star Trek

  1. Leave your bigotry in your quarters when you report to the bridge.
  2. Every Kirk needs a Spock in order to make sane decisions in insane times.
  3. Dr. McCoy is a doctor, not a physicist. He can mend broken bones. But he cannot fix your elbow to bend both ways.
  4. Life will sometimes go at Warp Factor 1.
  5. But if it stays at Warp Factor 1, call Mr. Scott.
  6. Let your son know that you love him, even if you are Sarek of the house of Surak.
  7. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.
  8. However, ALL life is sacred, even the humblest, simplest, and weakest. Only nature is allowed to engage in natural selection.
  9. Your crew’s safety is not a currency to pay for Dilithium crystals.
  10. But diplomacy is a tool of great flexibility. Use it.
  11. War is immoral. Period.
  12. The universe is a vast, vast place with no end and no beginning.
  13. Pettiness is illogical.
  14. There is no remedy for a broken heart. Except for Dr. McCoy’s secret stash of Saurian Brandy.
  15. But even Romulan Ale will do. Better than Scotty’s brand of Moonshine!
  16. Ask Chekhov for a dollar every time he says “vas inwented in Russia.” You will be rich.
  17. Let Uhura speak Klingon.
  18. NEVER challenge Sulu to a duel. You will lose!
  19. Replicated cheese is just not the same as the real thing. Relish it while you’re on shore leave.
  20. Just because Spock doesn’t cry does not mean that he can’t.
  21. We all have our counterparts in the mirror verse.  But we can always rise above them.
  22. Don’t be ashamed of going to sick bay when you need to.
  23. Treat her like a lady and she will always bring you home.
  24. It will always be hard to decide who was worse: Khan or Admiral Marcus.
  25. Sometimes, miracles do happen. Allow Spock to always be your friend.
  26. Beware of James Tomcat Kirk!
  27. But don’t forget to have a crush on him.
  28. Logic is sexy.
  29. Never violate the Prime Directive.
  30. The universe DOES NOT revolve around human beings.
  31. Don’t repress emotion. Master it.
  32. Because this simple feeling is superior to the Kolinahr.
  33. Every child needs a pet sehlat to grow up with.
  34. Allow T’Pring to go if she doesn’t want you.
  35. There is an Uhura somewhere who will hold you tight even if your world is literally coming to an end.
  36. Amanda knew she was a loved wife and a cherished mother.
  37. But Spock wishes he could have told her that more often.
  38. Keep Tellarites away from Andorians.
  39. Never underestimate your older self.
  40. Dare yourself to do better than George Kirk.
  41. Accepting a hypospray for the pain does not make you weak.
  42. Don’t doubt the smartness of the 17-year-old navigator. He knows what he’s doing.
  43. Sometimes, all you need is a bowl of Plomeek soup.
  44. Ask Nurse Chapel politely for her recipe.
  45. Steady as she goes, Mr. Sulu.
  46. If you’re a true Trekkie, you will not make jokes about expendable “red shirts.”
  47. If Janice Rand says no, she means no– even if you are the captain.
  48. Your crew can be your family if you will let them.
  49. Orion women are more than just their bodies. Remember, there would be no Captain Kirk without Gaila’s badass programming skills.
  50. Live long and prosper (It is easier said than done… but try!)

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